You in Target…

You. You in Target last Saturday with your workout capris and your frappachino. You annoy me. I’m not envious of your 45-minute cardio workout, your leisurely picking out of the bathroom towels, your last-minute stop to Starbucks. I used to be. Back when I was new at this, I grieved over lost Saturdays, leisure time, and uninterrupted sleep, thinking these the biggest losses of mothering. I started out selfish with a growing love. Now, I know the deep curse of parenting. It’s love.
Unfortunately for us humans, grown-up love isn’t pink and sparkly like a Valentine’s card. It’s painful like an amputation. It bloats with huge hopes, deflates with fear, and gets choked up with worry. And parenting? It’s love times 1000.
The former Jessica had more time, money, and muscle tone, but more significantly, her heart was smaller. Her life was easier; her thoughts simpler. I know now that parenting this little guy is overwhelming, not for lack of love, but because there is so much. His hurts are mine, along with ten thousand more I fear for. And he’s only five months old!! As far as I can tell, there is no remedy, only the prayer: “Lord, he’s yours. I trust you…”

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2 thoughts on “You in Target…

  1. "Why worry when you can pray? Trust Jesus, He is the way. Don't be a doubting Thomas – God's word is full of promise. Why worry, worry, worry – when you can pray?"

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